The Things We Lost
by YuzuhaMikoto
Summary: While I can't say that I am surprised, I would have love to just catch a break for once. Who knew moving back to my childhood house would have such an impact on an already stressful life? Between High school, Family and weirdly fascinating hair colours I could really do without the whole supernatural vampire thing. (Edward X Astoria) (dark themes mentioned)


Twilight is the creative property of Stephenie Meyer and I am in no way claiming profit of it. I only own Astoria, and any other Original Characters. This is merely someone messing with the story line for their own amusement.

-o-

 _Instead of saying, "I'm damaged, I'm broken, I have trust issues" say "I'm healing, I'm rediscovering myself, I'm starting over."_

 _-Horacio Jones_

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Young adult novels generally start the same. There is a completely normal character (usually around the age of 16, on the verge of adulthood). Then there is the sidekick best friend who will compensate their lack of power with snarky comments and one liners that seem so relatable that people can't help but love them. next up is the dark force of supernatural origin or well… you know, the government that usually ends up being the main villain. Oh and what is a good young adult novel without a tragic backstory (usually found in the male protagonist of course)? Well, I can't deny that there are some similarities with how my life ended up being but this is real life, not some silly novel.

 **-o-**

I couldn't help but judge the girl in the mirror. Eyes that are not quite green but not quite blue either, just a weird in between colour, ashy blond hair and skin so pale you could see some veins, I frowned and sighed. It felt weird being back in Forks after so many years. When my parents got divorced, my mother was give custody over me. Not because my father was bad or anything but as an artist they didn't deem him fit to properly take care of a child (not having a steady income being one of the main concerns.).

Mom and I moved to Seattle where she became an executive assistant to some big CEO or something, this is also how she met her second husband, a business partner of her boss. Every couple of weeks I would spend a weekend at my dad's place, I loved those days. We would go hiking, or he would take me down to first beach, sometimes we would go see a movie down in Port Angeles… it was a welcome reprieve from the busy city life. Unfortunately, that came to an abrupt halt when he suddenly died on one of his many excursions in pursuit of inspiration.

So yes, it felt weird being back after four years, even more so because we were living in our old house. I took one last glance at my appearance before picking up my bag and going downstairs. We moved in last week after a tedious renovation process, and today would mark my first day of school. Transferring schools was pretty easy in a way. I did it when I moved to Seattle, then again when we moved closer to my mother's work place, when we moved in with Henry, another time when she filed for divorce and finally the fifth time right now.

This time however I was excited. I grew up here, I went to elementary school here, had friends (we kept in touch when I would visit and even after that for the most part), I wouldn't go in blind for once.

"Morning mum." I sat my bag down next to my chair and dug into the bowl of soy yoghurt, granola and dried fruits. (I know, what teenager eats a healthy breakfast right? The ones with mothers that are focused on having a healthy life style to preserve beauty.) Mom hummed in recognition but continued reading her papers and drinking from the slightly chipped and faded mug I had gotten her years ago.

"I'm excited to see my old friends again," I swallowed another spoonful of my breakfast "we have so much catching up to do, mailing is great but it's not the same as talking face to face." finally she looked up to give me a fond smile, though she still hadn't said anything. I guess our relationship was still a bit rocky after the whole ordeal…

Pulling up at Forks High was a bit … well… daunting. My red Audi S4 was rather eye catching in this sea of older cars, people were definitely staring. Taking a deep breath I shrugged the anxiety away, put on my red trench coat and went on to my first class of the day. I felt like an exhibit in a zoo, but I held my head high. There were a few people I vaguely recognised , and I smiled at them but didn't stop to chat just yet. That would come later, let them wonder for a bit.

-o-

"Look, all I'm saying is that Mr. Carrow should probably get someone to pull that stick out of his ass because it's causing him a lot of anger issues apparently." Walking with Ben to lunch was a godsend, it would have been unnecessarily awkward for me to have lunch on my own on my first day back. He let out a huff before grinning.

"We've been trying to have someone do that for so long now, it's no use," He pushed open the door to let me go in first "We suspect it is permanently fused with his body by now."

"I can't say it surprises me…" I shrugged and took the offered seat once we reached the table. "Guess who's back?" Angela who was sitting on my left put her arm around me and pulled me closer in a semblance of a hug, Lauren smiled widely while Tyler pumped his fist in the air "It's good to have you back Aster!" I was introduced to Mike Newton, who had moved to Forks right after I had left and reconnected with Jessica who was more social than I seemed to remember. Today seemed to be a good day.

After Lunch Mike walked me to Biology, he was an easy going boy and I could see why he was so popular, though he did seem to latch on to people rather quickly. Finally we walked into the classroom, most of the seats were still open so I beelined it to my usual seating choice. Mike sat on the edge of the desk as we continued to talk.

"There were some issues with the renovation plan which is why I arrived late." I explained "There was about a 2 week delay, I should have started last week on september first like everyone else." I shrugged in a 'what can you do about it way'. It was bothersome, the lease on our apartment had ended so we spent the remaining days in a hotel. .

When the bell rang Mr. Banner called for attention and started class. Focusing was hard, The classroom was rather warm, the fluorescent lights were just a tad too bright (except that one in the corner by the door which seemed to dim at random intervals) and I was just a bit too excited about this whole day to properly pay attention. I looked around the room, trying to see if I recognised any other people. In the front sat a girl I vaguely remember being called Sarah, four seats to my left there was a boy named Brian if i wasn't mistaken, in the back sat Heather (I made a mental note to talk to her one of these days) and right in front of me sat a completely unfamiliar person. I cocked my head to the side as I racked my brain for any memories of such fascinating hair. I was almost tempted to reach out and touch the bronze coloured strands.

No matter how long I thought about it, he was completely unfamiliar. At one point he briefly turned around when I was tapping my pen against the table and I got a good look at his face. His brows were furrowed and his mouth was set in a rather thin line, his eyes went down to the pen that was still being abused and I smiled sheepishly but ultimately stopped annoying the poor boy. I briefly started to pay attention to what Mr. Banner was talking about.

-o-

"Believe me, my mom won't care." Lauren and I were walking side by side equally sweaty down the parking lot "I used to hang out with friends after school all the time." We stopped next to my shiny red car and I motioned for her to get in. "I can always text her but she's still up in Seattle for the next two days." It was a temporary thing, until she had found a replacement for herself. Unfortunately finding a good assistant was harder than it sounded.

I turned on the heating before plugging in my phone. Lauren Mallory was one of the first friends I made as a child, we had our ups and downs but who doesn't? Even as a child she was rather pretty so I wasn't surprised to hear she was one of the popular girls in school it made me, dare I say it, proud. Perhaps she wasn't the nicest person but at least she was always straightforward about everything. If she didn't like you, you would know.

The afternoon out with Lauren was refreshing, there was a lot of catching up to do after all. While I had fun, I was glad to see my bed again. You never realise just how exhausted you are when there is still so much to do. With today marking the first day of a new start I was finally able to relax , I was happy, I was smiling, I was starting to be myself again.

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A/N: Let's get some things out of the way right now. I am not from Seattle, Washington or even America, English is my third language and I am quite the cynic.

I had many issues with how the books were written when I was younger and thought why not challenge yourself and give it your own spin Kimmy? There will be possible triggers in later chapters but they will always be announced so look out for those. I won't make this overly dramatic either so don't worry about that. I wanted to create a character that isn't a brick wall that everyone finds attractive at first sight, nor did I want it to be a bombshell bitch. as you may notice, there will be no Bella X Edward, they weren't healthy for each other, no, their whole relationship wasn't healthy period. Dumping your friends for a boy, said boy being hot and cold, the sheer awkwardness of it all. there was no foundation other than the fact that her blood sang to him.


End file.
